Friday Funnies Brought to you By Chris and Uncle Bob

Chris' Uncle Bob sends him some of the funniest jokes I have read....ever! So since everyone can use a good laugh I will post the best of Bob's weekly jokes to get your weekend started. Some, ok well many are not appropriate for sensitive audiences, so be warned. So without further adieu....

The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why women liked Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to Won Ton spelled backward is NOT NOW!


A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem.
While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the
husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury
her here, in the Holy Land, for $150." The man thought about it and
told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your
wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you
would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and
three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

Subject: Roger was in trouble...........

Roger was in trouble. He'd forgotten his wedding anniversary.

Patti was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a
gift in the driveway that, when I step on it, will go from 0 to 200 in
less than 6 seconds!"

The next morning, Roger got up early and left for work. When Patti woke up,
she looked out the window and sure enough, there was a box in the middle of
the driveway. Confused, she put on her robe, ran out to the driveway, and
brought the box into the house. She opened it and found a brand new
bathroom scale.

Funeral services for Roger have been scheduled for Friday.